By Doug Giles
Why don’t you sell even more loopy crap to the vacillating voting morons who’re beginning to wake up from the Obama voodoo juice you seduced them with four years ago?
Yes, if you’re going to keep your constituents from making the savvy leap from Barack’s Marxism into more of an American free market system you’ve gotta ramp up the rhetoric, or they could officially wake up and leave your loser for Mitt.
. . . . . .
· Romney hates cute kittens and ring-tailed lemurs.
· Romney makes dogs ride on top of airplanes. Screw the cars. Say airplanes. It’s more terrifying.
· Romney wants poor people to drink mud and breathe secondhand smoke.
· Romney enslaves orphans and makes them pull his sled during leopard seal hunts. Naked. In the dead of winter.
· Romney purposely runs over manatees when he’s boating in south Florida.
· Romney thinks you ought to keep more of the money you’ve made versus giving it to lazy government sponges.
· Romney has five sons. Who does that?
· Romney was the third man on the grassy knoll. Lee Romney Oswald.
· Romney hates apples, eggs and pie.
· Romney gave a kid spinal meningitis.
· Romney pulled the spine out of a puppy once.
· Romney’s granddad killed Abraham Lincoln.
· Romney has a third nipple.
· Romney and his wife were at OJ’s house the night Nicole and Ron Goldman were killed. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
Some of you are asking, “What if people check to see if the aforementioned sputum is true . . . .? . . . .
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